Another cibai story: How to hit on a mafia girl

This all happened last Saturday. It’s heavy on the comfort stage.
I’m at a karaoke bar with my wings. A hot 2 set is called up on stage to do a Backstreet Boys song. My wing and I proceed to sit down at their table while they are on stage. It’s an empty table with 4 seats. They finish the song and come back to the table. We block their seats, and our interaction went something like this:

Me: “Can’t sit here. N Sync fans only.”
HB9: “Haha, right.”
Me: “No I’m serious. My friend Jason and I are loyal N’ Sync fans, and the Backstreet Boys are our main rivals, and we just don’t feel comfortable with you sitting down next to us.”
HB9: “Haha, shut up. Backstreet was waaaayyyy better.”
Me: “Noooo way. ‘N Sync had much higher sex appeal, and their dance routines were way better choreographed. Backstreet Boys songs were too slow.”
HB9: “Omg we’re gonna fight.”
Me: “Bring it on little girl. Let’s thumb wrestle.”

We thumb wrestle, I accuse her of cheating, we thumb wrestle again, I accuse her of trying to feel me up. This is the basic structure of the beginning of all my sarges.

Me: “You guys make a perfect karaoke team. You’re [HB9] the stage presence, and you’re [HB8] the voice.”

The girls look at each other.
My wing and I isolate to a different part of the bar. We sit at a table. Next to us is a table of like 12 guys. 2 of the guys seem to be lecturing everyone else. I’m sure it’s a bootcamp. My wing asks one of the guys if they are part of a bootcamp, and I guess he responds “yes” then quickly changes his mind and says “no.” It’s definitely a bootcamp, probably Pickup101. It didn’t surprise me much because, along with the Saddle Ranch, the bar we’re in is probably the single best place to sarge in LA.

Now we get into comfort. My target (the HB9) is on vacation from NYC. She’s Italian, all 4 grandparents emigrated from Sicily, her dad works in construction and in “waste management.” Her uncle (her father’s brother) just got out of a short jail stint for running an illegal casino in New York. My target is completely blinged out. She tells me her bracelet cost $18K and her watch $10K.
You get where I’m going with this.
Me: “Is your family in the mafia?”
HB: “Yeah.”
Me: “Wow. That’s really cool.”

I think it’s kind of weird that she admits this outright, so I quiz her a little on the structure of mafia. She knows the 5 New York families (Genovese, Lucchese, Columbo, Bonano, Gambino), and she knows a little bit about the ranking system. Turns out that she read the newspaper article about her uncle going to jail and found out which family her father and uncle are a part of, and their supposed ranks.

We get into deep comfort. I elicit her career values – she currently goes to fashion school and wants to one day create her own fashion line and open up a boutique clothing store. Why just a boutique store, and not build the company? She wants to have time for a family. I then do a related cold-read based upon this information and my knowledge of Italian culture:

Me: “It must be hard being in Italian-American family. The male is always more important. He’s the one who is supposed to go out and have a career. He’s the one who can truly pursue his dreams and find out who he is and what he’s capable of in life. But as a woman it’s like your only goal in life is to get married and raise a family. No one tells you to find a career that makes you happy; no one really tells you to go out and pursue your dreams.”
HB: “Yeah! I totally feel that way…”

This was a really good cold read, and I’m going to keep it in my permanent archive. It just doesn’t apply to Italian-American girls, it can apply to mostly anyone. When I elicit values, most girls want a family AND a career, so of course a career that allows them time for their family. Girls are often torn between their career goals and their family goals – they want both, but they realize that they are going to have sacrifice something to get both, and that something is usually a career. If you show a girl that you understand this, as I did here, you’ll connect with her on a deep level.

I then run the ideal boyfriend EV sequence. He’s honest, loyal, family-oriented, ambitious, and a bunch of other things I can’t remember. Thankfully, she didn’t mention Italian, which I’m not. She asks about my ideal girlfriend, and I mirror the same qualities.
My comfort game good until this point. This is when I make my first mistake of the evening:

HB: “How many girls have you been with?”
Normally, I NEVER answer this question. Why? It’s lose-lose. Too many and you’re a whore, too few and you’re a loser. But we were being to open with each other that I decided to answer the question, though not truthfully.

Me: “15”

Obviously it’s been more, but I wasn’t going to tell her the truth. But 15 is still way too many for her.

HB: “That is really gross. How could you sleep with so many people? Sex is actually meaningful to me. It’s not something you give and take.”
She begins qualifying me about my sexual history. Asks how many are ONS’s, how long it takes me to have sex in a relationship, says she’s only been with 2 people, would never have a ONS, always waits at least a month in a relationship to have sex.

So I pull out Style’s Relationship Expectations Routine:

Me: “I don’t think it’s fair to go into any kind of relationship with expectations. It’s not a shared relationship that way – it’s you trying to make the other person conform to your expectations. I let a relationship take its own course - I don’t try to force it in one direction or the other, but I also don’t fight it if it goes in that direction. I had one relationship where we slept together the first night because there was immediate passion, and I had another where it took 3 months. But either way was fine because it just felt natural and we didn’t try to steer things in one direction or the other.”

She agrees with this, but she still can’t get over the ONS thing. So I decide to pull out a variation of Riker’s 3 Rules, even though this is usually used in the seduction phase:
Me: “Actually, before I ever have sex, I have 3 rules that my partner and I must abide by.”
HB: “What are they?”
Me: “The first is that we’re safe and use a condom. The second is that it has to be something that we both really want to do. And the third is that we have to be able to wake up in the morning and be happy about what we did, and feel good about ourselves every time we get that tingly feeling inside thinking about last night.”
HB: [thinks about it for a few seconds] “I like those.”

It worked. Her body language totally opens up to me after, she relaxes, and her concerns about my promiscuity disappear. The lesson is that Riker’s 3 Rules aren’t just useful in the seduction phase. They can be useful in comfort too, if the girl is wondering whether you want to sleep with her because she’s actually special, or just because she has a vagina. I will now begin using Riker’s 3 Rules earlier in my sarges.

Eventually we all get in the car to head back to my apartment. Seeding the bounce wasn’t hard as my target’s friends had already decided that they were coming back. This is where the night gets interesting.

I start making out with my target in the backseat of the car. I pull her hair as we make out. This causes her to go ANIMALISTIC on me. Yes, pulling a girl’s hair always turns her on, but with this girl, she just went insane. She starts grabbing my crotch, puts my hand down her pants, moans loudly. This is all with 3 other people in the car. I probably could have fucked her right there if I wanted to.

We get back home and I take my target right into the bedroom. No resistance on her part. We get down to business, and she likes it rough. Now I’ve been with a lot of girls who like it rough, but this girl was like nothing I had seen before. The hookup basically turned into one big wrestling match. We’re body slamming each other against the wall, and her $28K worth of jewelry is repeatedly clanking against my wall, but she’s so zoned out that she doesn’t notice. And she was so tiny too – maybe 5’2, 100 lbs.

Meanwhile, she enjoys putting on a little girl voice and pleading for me to stop “no, no, please stop”. But then she makes me do the same thing to her – she’d jump on me, tie my hands down, and say “tell me to stop baby, beg me to stop” and she’s grip my hands tighter until I told her top stop. This girl is very strange.

Now that HB9 sees I’m playing the game correctly, she ups the anti and decides to throw the mobster daddy in the equation. “No, please stop” becomes “no, stop, I’ll get my daddy to come after you.” Great, now I’m about to be whacked by mobster daddy.

This is not to mention that play-fighting is becoming more intense. She has maneuvered her body under mine so that the full force of my body is on top of her. She asks me to choke her a couple times. She asks me if I have any rope to tie her hands to the bedpost.
This hookup isn’t even sexual anymore. This girl isn’t into sex; she’s into being dominated. And after a half hour of this, I’m exhausted, and not at all aroused.
Plus, all the “no no no” is starting to fuck with my head. If someone had walked into the room, they really would have thought it was rape. And her acting was great – she made the “no no no”s sound incredibly real. I started second guessing myself – we are hooking up, correct? And her father being in the mob didn’t do anything to alleviate my concerns.
I finally call off the hookup and tell her that we should watch television with everyone else. We do, and her sweet girl comes out again. We talk some more about her fashion school and such, and finally I call her a cab and she heads home.

Another crazy night. Thinking back on it, I still can’t figure out where this chick’s wild side came from. It’s generally girls’ with daddy problems that like it rough, particularly girls who’s daddy left the family. She clearly wasn’t that. Perhaps an over controlling father? If that was a case, I’d expect her to be an outright slut, but necessarily a girl who likes rough sex. Who knows?